In his first story, he tells a tale about a small station at the end of the line, where the train is always running late.
This day, miracles of miracles, it seems it will be on time. Everybody is so happy about this, with the exception of the Station Master. Someone asks why he is so glum.
He replies ... "It is yesterday's train"!!!
His other story is about a point failure at Dysart, on the up-side of Seymour. There is a siding at Dysart and not much else. It is used by the Army to unload goods for the base at Puckapunyal.
It is Christmas Eve, and with all the extra trains running, Train Control decides to put a train into this siding to let another train go past. These points are operated from Seymour. After the train has gone by, the Signalman tries to operate the points to get the waiting train on the main line, without success.
It is outside working hours and the Signal Adjusters are required to attend, eventually finding the problem. It is all caused by a small turtle that has somehow got in between the blade and the rail. Its hard shell will not let the points close.
After the dust settles it is decided to call an enquiry into the incident.
The Traffic branch blames the Signals branch and, as usual, nothing more happens.
As usual, no one has any sympathy for the poor turtle!
I got this story second hand. I think the bloke who told it to me was pulling my leg. He called it the 'Flood, Fire and Famine' trip. This trip is on the down from Adelaide to Alice Springs.
There are only 12 passengers, a mixture of women and men, on the train to Alice Springs this day and they are going to stay on the train, come what may.
The train is going along quite well, passing over a bridge which has caused trouble on previous trips, but the forecast is not good. Heavy rain is expected. There are thoughts about backing over this bridge, but it is too late for that.
The passengers have become friends. For one couple, this is their big trip before they settle down to a more sedate life.
The crew and passengers realise they can only go forward now. Nearing half way, they are hoping to get over the next big bridge. However, there has been heavy rain up north, so now they can go neither forward or back, and the flood water is coming towards them.
After a long time the flood waters drain away. The bridge has stood up well, they will make up time.
After a wet spring there is a lot of growth, and after a dry summer, there is fodder for fires, and with dry storms, the worst happens. Once again they are in a safe area, but the track and sleepers have been burnt out for miles.
The Railway staff are worried about where the train is and that it may have run out of food and water. A Helicopter is organised and eventually finds the train. The offer is made to take some of the passengers to Alice Springs, but there are no takers.
Eventually they get to Alice Springs, but there is another drama!
A woman travelling on the train is about to have a baby. A doctor delivers a baby girl, and the woman gets a lecture from him about going on a trip like the Ghan in that condition.
The woman replies ... '"when I left Adelaide, I was not in that condition"!
June 2026

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